My journey so far

I remember i started my present job as a Therapeutic Specialist in February 2008, which was about 7 months ago. I didn't know what to expect, my first time coming into an MNC company. I was excited, able to jump so far in a short period of time...wanting so much to succeed here. I was also fearful, afraid and don't know what was in store. Before this, i worked in a small local company with loads of stuff to do, less recognition for my hard work and nobody ever notice much about you. I remembered starting my first day here in 1st February 2008. Everybody was nice to me. Friendly and warm hospitality. It helped raise my spirits. And it was also nearing the CNY which got me even hyped up. Colleagues were passing around mandarin oranges and i was getting ang pow packets from people i hardly knew...a stark difference from my ex company where they hide the oranges to themselves and only gave red packets to those they knew bout 2 years and above. I felt good, and thought i really like this company culture where everyone seems really ok.
The beginning wasn't easy. Finding myself in places i never been before for the first time...Sabak Bernam, Sekinchan, Slim River, Tanjung Sepat...without a map in hand, without guidance from my senior and end up in clinics full of drug addicts. I was terrified, but i perservered.
In the beginning it was quiet lonely, travelling to those places on my own and constantly being on the road...driving long hours alone. Sometimes, i pack my own food for lunch and had my lunch in my car with my radio on and cushion for comfort. I felt lonely...so alone. After 2 months, in April i was joined by new collegues who became my close friends and bff also. Hor Kereen? All of us bonded well and got along cause we were all new in the company. After that, my days weren't so lonely anymore. While im driving long distance, my collegues would call me up to chit chat and the journey gotten easier and more bearable. We would call each other and share how our day went and our encounter with strange doctors. Haha...
For the first time, i got along well with my team mates. We supported each other in many ways and really worked as a team. My team consist of Tang Chee Ping, Kereen Ting, Stephen Tong (which we called "Ting Tong Tang" in the beginning...haha...Sweet Fun, Tesso, Alan Khoo, Khoo Szee Nyee, Nancy, Siau Wei and ME! We always discussed sales tactics on how to bring in more sales, practice our detailing and presentation skills and also talked many funny stuff together. Finally, i felt like i belonged somewhere. Over the months...we developed many "vocabs" that was uniquely for our team. Such as "If its meant to be, its meant to be" (Sweet Fun), "Kai Sik is Yim Sik" (Sweet Fun), "Yayaya" (Stephen Tong), "Super" (Tesso + Sweet Fun), "Duh" (ME), "Kinky" (ME), "KNS" (Tesso),"NTTL" (Tesso), "O Me Tou Fou" (Tesso), "whatever" (ME), "There can be miracle" (Stephen Tong, inspired by boss), "Die die" (boss), "Do the right thing" (boss) among many others. All these were words that stuck with us which we repeated countlessly during our many conversations with each other that makes it all the more interesting.
I am pressured to hit 110 percent of my target for this month and next month, if i can't do it...the company will ask me to leave. I really feel like i don't want to leave. To leave a place where i belonged, where i mattered, where people saw me for who i am. To leave my colleagues who was my endless support that makes my job easier and more enjoyable, to be able to put a smile on their faces with silly jokes, to have colleagues who helped me along the way and cared for me. I don't know how i would feel if i have to leave...will i cry? Will i try to force a smile so everyone else won't be so sad? I don't know.